Day 272 Ain't No Doughnut Gonna Take Me Down

Today, I had the opportunity to come face to face with my one weakness, pastries. I love doughnuts more than I love most people and today, I had to pick up food for someone, only to be faced with long johns, fritters, and cinnamon rolls, they smelled like what I imagine angels to smell like. I didn't of course have any of the glaze covered beauties , I stuck to my usual lunch, a hummus sandwich, a granola bar, and a spicy V8. Tonight, I had a salad, with a ton of roasted garlic and butternut squash, it was fantabulus and my breath smells like a big ol bulb of stinking rose, good thing I live solo. Tomorrow is the Tulsa State fair and I'm not going, the only reason to go is for the food and that's out of the question, so I'm staying here, to catch up on paperwork, blah. Perhaps I'll treat myself to a new book, if I complete my neverending stack of stupid.
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Day 157 My Noodles My Life

I started out my day with a little candy, had a piece of cake in the middle, some hummus with pita chips thrown in for good measure, and potatoes for dinner. This was in hindsight, a Wheaties kind of day, but I failed in that regard. Today, I cried in front of my co-workers, it's true we were all standing on the edge of a psychotic break, but I was the one who opened the dam. We are so close to our audit and tempers are flaring, no one is smiling, and there's not a potluck in sight....sigh. Oh, how far away our Christmas extravaganza of aught ten seems now. There was so much joy, so many games, so much food. Today, was like a scene out of Wall Street, papers were flying, people were waving their tiny fists, talking above the fray, it was chaos and I can only hope for better times ahead. Today, I'm making a change! Today, I will not worry for the undone or the mistaken, today, I will worry only that the noodles are cooked to exactly seven minutes and that the toothpick comes clean out of the cake. Today, I take back my life!
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Day 62 The Promised Land Has A Salad Bar

So, after 3 years on the lookout, I finally found my perfect grocery store, my search has been fraught with peril, disappointment, and inconvenience, but I never gave up the dream. Before I even begin to list everything that makes a good grocery store, let me just say what its not. A good grocery store does not have wilted lettuce, expired yogurt, dirty floors/employees, or an in store bank with bars on the teller window. A great food market will not require me to dodge gunshots or muggers in the parking lot and will have a full array of vegetable available for purchase, not just potatoes, onions, and the aforementioned wilted lettuce. On the other hand, the store should not be guilty of pandering to the upper crust, trendsetters, who pay 6.00 for a lb. of grapes (I'm looking at you Whole Foods). I don't need olives in Romanian apple brine, I just want the green ones, the black ones, and sometimes the purple ones, for less than I would pay for a new Mustang, I like choice, I just don't need the most expensive ones. I also have an issue with the grocery stores, located in small towns, who refuse to sell ANYTHING but white bread and Kraft in the blue box, would it kill you to sell hummus or tofu? These are not specialty items, like the grand olive bar, you will not be considered a traitor of the American dream if you sell these items. There has to be a balance between all of my expectations. So, let me recap, I want a grocery store, which falls into my route, on the side of the street, where traffic flows homeward, with a complete collection of vegetables and tofu, no muggers, and maybe a fresh salad bar. Tonight I found that holy place in Jenks, Oklahoma, America. The new Reasors is clean, so very clean, not one tweaker asked me for a ride in the parking lot, the produce was fresh and affordable, and there was....a salad bar. It's not too far off my route and when I left, the traffic was pleasant and the parking lot ample for maneuvering, I think we have a winner, I wish the whole world had a grocery store like mine!
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Day 60 Hummus On The Mountaintop

Today, I had a work meeting in a What-a-burger restaurant, if you are not familiar with this classy establishment, let me educate you. What-a-burger has onion rings comparable to golden rings of sunlight and soda cups as big as a Chihuahua. Before the conversion, I used to enjoy such deliciousness as fried pumpkin pies, fried cherry pies, fried apple pies, big fat egg and cheese biscuits, potato, egg and cheese burritos, and of course french fries and hash-taters. It was a veritable smorgasbord of every food with a warning label, and smelled like the state fair, half of my left thigh and part of my chin came from What-a-burger. Back in the day, I would sit in the drive-through, which took on average 7-60 minutes longer than any other joint on earth, for my giant early morning soda. So, today I sat in this fine establishment, amidst the smell of grease and pie, quietly pondering how far I have come, it was so quiet, I could almost hear the arteries hardening around me. I comforted myself with an ice cold cup o' Culligan from the office water cooler and eventually reached a Zen state of oneness with what What-a-burger had to tell me. The fried pumpkin pies would always be here to smell, in fact sometimes when the wind shifts just right, I can almost catch a whiff from my office across the street, and that's OK. It's OK because What-a-burger is no longer the snack time king of greasy mind control tactics and their giant soda kegs are too big for the cup holders anyway. For lunch, I went back to my office and had a hummus and jalapeno sandwich, you can't get that kind of fiber from a greasy spoon burger dive. Here's to better habits and the drive through I call my kitchen.
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