Day 353 I Am Stronger Than Three Pizzas Tall

Today, we had a graduation ceremony for one of our families and celebrated with pizza and bowling, I of course did not eat the pizza. I smelled the pizza, I looked at the pizza, I fantasized about the pizza, I endured good natured ridicule and razing about the pizza, but I did not eat it. I was stronger than the smell of cheese and crust and fat and grease. Also, I learned that one hour of bowling burns about 200 calories, double score! For dinner, I had left over chili again, along with a kiwi and an orange. Everyone knows how much I hate oranges but I had to eat the orange to remove the taste of kiwi from my tongue, that's pretty bad. I'm pretty pleased with myself right now! My challenge is drawing to a close and in a few days, I will reveal my new 365 day challenge...hold your breath!
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Day 341 I Do Not Prefer The Pear

Today, I had a pretty good plan for lunch, but it turned out to be only half a plan and half a dirty, rotten, under-ripe disappointment. As everyone knows, I do not relish fruit, but I eat it because it's healthy and it must be done. For lunch I packed a half a peanut butter sandwich on wheat bread, an orange (loath them), and a pear. I was pretty excited about the pear, as something to help wash down the orange, but my excitement was premature. I don't remember the last time I ate a pear, but it's been a while, I saw them at the grocery and thought they were a good alternative to my usual Granny Smith Apples. This particular evil pear was a trickster, it looked OK, green, firm, looked like a pear, but when I cut into it, I had to saw it with the knife, I sawed and sawed and sawed until Carpel tunnel syndrome set in. I sawed for quite a while and finally had to get down to the business of eating as I had an appointment to get to. I tried to eat said pear, but it was like chewing on someone's empty soul and tasted about the same, I had to abandon the effort and toss it. The good thing is that the orange was pretty tasty after the pear, perhaps the universe is shifting.
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Day 76 Breakfast In A Van Down By The River

Well, I really didn't have to worry about whether or not the food at the retreat fit into my little challenge here, because there wasn't much of it. It wasn't restaurant food, that's for sure, when we rolled past the Yoga barn at 8:30, I had high hopes for fresh, organic, spa food as the website would lead one to believe. In fact, the quality of this non-existent food and the fact that it was free was the reason I chose to allow this food into the challenge. No health concerns, no financial concerns, fresh, wholesome, organic, those were the words. Instead, "breakfast" was a van full of rice crispy treats, goldfish, Gatorade, and water....and we had to dine outside in the cold and the mighty, mighty wind. Lunch was like 5 hours later, inside this time, but no vegetarian options and no room at the table (I balanced my junk on my lap). I had a cheese sandwich on white bread, which I had pulled the ham off of, a bag of sunflower seeds and nuts, and some dried up old packaged cookies. This sad excuse for lunch also managed to offend me with an orange, which I gave to my co-worker in exchange for a granola bar. (If you'll remember, I have that table rage for citrus). I was still hopeful for dinner, which I thought was going to be in an actual dining room, and I had been promised a vegetarian option, no such luck! It wasn't even on site, it was some greasy spoon burger joint about 10 miles away. Someone had ordered me a salad and a baked potato, which I cancelled as soon as I walked in the door, I was a jerk, I didn't want a salad and a baked potato. If I wanted a salad and a baked potato, I wouldn't eat it in a restaurant, I would make it fresh in my own kitchen and it would be prepared within my control in regard to salt, butter, salad dressings, and ingredients. So, I give two bit fat thumbs down to the Canebrake resort, you can take your pitiful excuse for a catering gig and send it on down the zip line.
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Day 57 Onion Tea And Other Circusy Concoctions

I fully believe that we have everything we need in nature to cure ourselves of illness and today, I have used a little bit of everything. The night before last, I began drinking green tea with raw ginger, when I felt the first tickle in my throat, last night, I upped the ante and added cayenne and garlic. Today, I have tripled the tea intake and am about to add onion juice, lemon, and honey to my already strange concoction. I'm actually feeling better than this morning and think that my cockamamie remedies are working. I felt good enough to go to the grocery store for fruit and actually bought the dreaded oranges, everyone knows I hate oranges, I hate the smell, the taste...the color, but for immunitys sake, I am going to maybe squeeze some juice into my tea, along with the other stuff. For dinner, I had blueberries, raspberries, blackberries, and pomegranate juice. Have I left anything out? Could I possible add anything else to my veritable witch's brew of natural medicine? I intend to be completely cured by Monday morning, to prove that there is no need for NyQuil, or Theraflu, or whatever else Wal-green's sells in it's cold and flu section. Now I just have to figure out how to get enough juice out of the onion to cover the citrus smell, I think I would rather eat a beet.
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